This pretty much made my Friday.

http://www.kirkcameron.com/

Lovely little audio-based surprise.

Priorities.

Eiko: I can totally smell gas from the fireplace.

Peter: Me too. Kind of unsettling.

Eiko: Before you got up I was wondering: if the fireplace exploded, would I grab Yoshi or wake you up from your nap?

Peter: Yoshi, obviously. I can find my own way out.

Eiko: Really? I didn't think you'd say that.

Peter: I know where I stand.

Still traumatized.

Continued inability to get past Fo's haircut. Too many nasty childhood memories. Will resume blogging soon.

P.S. Natalie? Really?

Roundup: America's Next Top Model Cycle 12 Episode 4, Project Runway Canada, the Week of Nothing

I'm still trying to get over Fo's haircut.

Agree that, in a given photo shoot, with her hair molded to stand up straight on her head, Fo's face can completely pull it off. She's a beautiful girl.

Disagree that anyone should have to walk around like this without the help of expert hair and makeup people.

Poor, poor Fo. Stunning girl. Terrible makeover. Many of the makeovers were hideous (what have they done to Tahlia?!), but now Fo looks like she's ten years old. It reminds me of a similar haircut I was given when I actually was ten, the results of which led many a well-meaning adult to comment on what an attractive little boy I was.

Fo's entire persona has shifted from hot mixed-race mama to awkward sexually ambiguous pre-teen.

Plus, they totally ruined Aminat's looks with the deconstruction of her afro. I don't think she's going to last, and who'll be left holding the bag? Me, because I thought she was going to win. Whoops. Also whoops: bye-bye Jessica. My predictions are completely in the toilet.

Speaking of toilets, I am now openly embracing of my hatred for Project Runway Canada's Kim, who spews sewage from her mouth whenever she speaks. I can handle almost any amount of attitude if it comes from talented people. For example, if Sunny somehow morphed into an everyone-hating diva, I'd be like, "Yeah, he's nasty. But he is better than everyone else. He's like, SUNNY." But Kim? Were we to say, "She's like, KIM," it would mean, "Would you just wake up and remember you're on national television and since you did this to get exposure, probably having everyone in Canada detest you is not the best way to promote yourself, especially as the one memorable garment you've made looked like you stuck some lace on a piece of wrapping paper. " Apparently, others agree.

Next week on Superfriends: Leto loses an entire week to the worst cold in the history of colds. She sits, she sniffles, she complains a lot. She uses all the toilet paper blowing her nose and then gets mad at Beter when they run out. Her presence? A pleasure, for eight straight days.

Roundup: America's Next Top Model Cycle 12 Episode 1, Project Runway Canada Episode 6, Nevada-bound Superfriends

Dear Tyra,

You had me at Las Vegas.

In fact, I was hoping the entire ANTM season would take place there, because then you could hold really weird challenges like making the girls create outfits out of poker chips, or buffet food, or have them do a photo shoot reenacting the pool scene in Showgirls, and Elizabeth Berkley could guest star and everything.

Other than the standard spoiled-brat-meets-girl-tough scrapping, notable moments included Tyra exiting the set in her "Goddess of Fierce" outfit, proclaiming, "Fierce! Fierce!" with every twirl, and Jay's amazing moose knuckle. Jay, spandex? Not so much.

And of course, the burned girl.

Last cycle I couldn't decide if transgendered Isis was being exploited or celebrated. Now I can't help feeling Tahlia is just another gimmick. Huge props to her for having the balls to be on the show, but I don't know if the producers realize quite what they're doing...she's only 18, after all. An 18-year-old in a potentially psychologically disastrous siutation, her fate in the hands of TYRA BANKS. Shudder.

My money is still on Aminat, or maybe Jessica (they've never had a Puerto Rican win!).

Next week: really the only episode to watch -- MAKEOVERS. But um, looking at this photo it seems like they give all the models the same moddish haircut, which would be weird, yet sort of clever. I think they should shave all their heads.

Heading up to our Northern skies, Kim gets even more annoying on Project Runway Canada. As with Christie, I'm a teeny bit concerned about slamming people who live in Vancouver, because she looks awfully familiar, and I probably know her, because Vancouver is very very small. But Kim, a word of advice? Tone it down. We don't need another Kenley.

Fyi, I missed The City this week. I don't think that's ever happened. Ah, the deep shame. I blame it on Ms. Conrad -- I can't really talk about her leaving The Hills without getting all choked up and hiding in my closet with a bag of Cheetos.

Next week on Superfriends: our heroes head back to Vegas in the search for a missing cactus, and Elizabeth Berkley.

This post sponsored by Cheetos.

Roundup: The City Episode 9, Project Runway Canada Episode 3, America's Next Top Model Cycle 12, Beater in a Leotard

All I really have to say is: Whitney's smackdown on Olivia after the "Don't get too drunk and fall down," comment? A thing of beauty.

Oh, and Erin? Cheating on national television = no date on New Years. I'm just saying. It shouldn't have been that much of a surprise.

I guess with all that isn't happening on The City, I'm dying for The Hills to come back. I know I keep flip-flopping. But I'm bored. These New York kids are bitchy and stuff, but back in LA we have a little something that can't be replicated, and that something is Justin Bobby. Miss you, JB. Miss you big time.

As prediced, poor Christy got the boot from Project Runway Canada. And that was after Brian Bailey told her to "Rise, rise like a phoenix, Christy!" I kind of like people who wear their emotions on their sleeves, until they start to remind me how I used to do the same thing, all those boardroom confessionals and sup-sup sobbing. So I was relieved to see Christy go, as I am so much more mature now. But I did feel bad for the girl, as she is from Vancouver, and likely to come after me with a piece of lead piping if I write anything else bad about her. You were great, Christy! And remember, I live in East Vancouver! East. Nowhere near Kits. (It is weird, though, to blog about TV people from your home city when you're Canadian and all.)

Speaking of maturity, only two weeks to go until cycle 12 of America's Next Top Model. I like how the website lists two of the girls' occupations as "Aspiring Models". Well yeah duh, they're all aspiring models. Did ANTM just call them "aspiring" so as not to admit they hired real models for the show? The rest are mostly students, including Aminat, who, from the initial pics only, I've put my money on.

Next week on Superfriends, Beater produces a series of instructional spinning videos in which he dons a full-body leotard, lights a cigarette and rides on his new bike while flute music plays in the background (original score, recorded by Beater). No instruction required; the viewer follows along as Beater does different moves on the bike. You'll be able to tell when to turn the resistance up because Beater will groan and sweat harder. $19.99 for the box set + plus $12.99 shipping & handling. Preorder at beatersbuns@beaterproductions.com.

Roundup: The City Episode 7, Project Runway Canada Episode 2 and Visitors with Viruses

The best thing about blogging about The City is that so little happens it's easy to catch up when one misses a few weeks, and to do it with minimal effort. Adam kissed some girl. Allie forgave him. Kelly said Allie was skinny. Allie got mad.

And then there's Olivia.

Disappointingly, Olivia's not in the show much. I'll give her the benefit of the doubt and assume it's not because she's a horrendous snit to be around and the crew mysteriously runs out of tape every time they're supposed to shoot her, but rather there's just not all that much going on with Olivia right now.

Even if there were, I doubt she'd tell us about it. Cause that would be like, immature.

Poor Whitney. She's obviously been instructed to recap the drama surrounding her and her friends by having girl chats with Olivia. Presumably, Olivia's been instructed, during these little exchanges, to nod and look interested and keep Whitney talking. But she shuts Whitney down every single time with nary a twitch in her stony face.

Whitney should leave her a note:

Dear Livs,

You know how we're supposed to do that scene together every day where I sit down and look over my shoulder from my desk and tell you things and you ask me lots of questions? Well...it's not so easy when you won't let me actually talk to you; when you tell me I'm childish and stuff and that you just don't want to hear it. Like, you know how I told you about Allie getting upset about what Kelly said, and how you said to stay out of it? Well I can't really, cause I'm getting PAID to do this TV SHOW and so are you and since I can't trust you with any of my personal stuff, I have to talk about other people. I'm supposed to be the narrator of this little chronicle, and you are making my job very, very difficult.

Look, I know it can be hard. I was like you, once! To make it easier, I'm enclosing seasons 1 and 2 of The Hills. Please study the Teen Vogue scenes where I listen carefully to Lauren and gasp at the appropriate moments. Notice how our friendship blossoms in that little alcove we shared amidst all those pretty clothes...Ah, Teen Vogue. I wonder if Lisa Love would take me back...

I would really appreciate anything you can do; it's not my fault I have immature people around me. My friends were hired by the show.

Hugs!!
Your Future BFF,
Whit

In news of slightly more refined television programming, Project Runway Canada is into its third week and holding strong at being average and sometimes bad. PRC's season one designers made the Americans look like rank amateurs, with the likes of the incredible Biddell and Lucian and Carlie Wong. This season, it looks like some of them apprenticed with Le Chateau, or maybe Sirens.

And then we have Christie, who, after receiving criticism from Brian Bailey, cried on national television and announced her work was terrible and why was she even there and she wanted to go home. This, before stalking out of the room. Christie dude, it's episode TWO. Presuming you don't get eliminated in the next episode, you have a long way to go. While the whole entitlement thing in the U.S. is way out of control (I love how, when Project Runway finalists are asked why they deserve to win, they explain that they've worked so hard and they're a mother of six kids and they've sacrificed; oh, how they've sacrificed...The judges don't effing care about your kids or how no one ever gave you a break in grade school, guys. They care about what you're going to bring to fashion.), these designers need a good dose of self-love.

Next week on Superfriends: Olichelle wafts into town, infected with everything you can catch in Costa Rica, and Beater and Leto rob a bank to make enough money to go to Vegas. If I don't post again it's because the fuzz are onto us.

A Rabbit, and a Dog.

One of the best things about living where we do is the Starbucks across the street. Not just because we always have access to coffee, but because it feels sort of community-ish to sit on the couch and watch other people in the community sit in the seats outside, and because sometimes our neighbor's French Bulldog Buster will happen along and one time Peter even got to babysit him for two minutes.

Almost as exciting is the guy who on sunny days pulls up in his white van, takes his white German Shepherd out and sits the dog upright on a chair, then carries his large white rabbit over to sit on the chair with the dog, nestled into its legs. The dog and rabbit sit and wait while their owner gets his coffee.

And here I thought all the oddballs had left Kitsilano.

Recipe: Not Too Beany Black Bean & Corn Tacos

This is what we did with the leftover beans and corn from the other night's Mexi Salad. Peter said they were the best veggie tacos he'd ever had. Peter is sweet, and also encouraging of my cooking, which is really quite self-serving if you think about it.

Note: I don't so much love black beans, and I like this recipe because the beans aren't the main attraction. There's a lot of stuff going on and they add interest and flavour without being all, "Here's another vegetarian recipe that is basically all about you shoving a bunch of beans in your face."

Serves 2

Ingredients:
- 1 small onion, diced
- 1 tsp. olive oil
- 1 cup canned corn
- 1 cup organic black beans, rinsed well
- pinch salt
- 1/2 pinch cayenne pepper (or however much you want)
- 1/3 package Old El Paso taco seasoning...I know, I know. All that sodium and MSG terribleness and it's probably not vegan. We just wanted something that really tasted like tacos, and we had it left over, and...anyway, I just found this recipe which seems to be the homemade equivalent (we'll try it next time).
- 1/3 cup water
- 1 package of small corn tortillas - 8 tortillas will provide a good-sized meal for two people
- chili powder to taste
- 2 lime wedges
- 1 avocado, sliced, sprinkled with lime juice from 1 wedge
- lettuce (any green kind), shredded
- salsa

Fry up the onion in the oil until it starts to soften, and then lower to medium heat. Add the corn and beans. Stir in the salt and cayenne pepper. Stir in the water gradually (I think there's a thickening agent in the store-bought seasoning, so if you're using your own spices, add less water; you want it to be slightly soupy but not crazy watery). Sprinkle with lime juice from the second wedge. Simmer on medium-low and let the mixture cook for about 8 minutes or until most of the water has absorbed and the mixture has become more saucy than soupy.

Fry the tortillas in a non-stick pan, about 30 seconds per side -- they really don't need very long and you just want them to get soft. Sprinkle a little bit of chili powder on each side for flavour.

Lay the tortillas flat on a dinner plate and add about 2-3 tbsp of bean mixture. Top with lettuce, avocado and salsa. Don't overstuff or they'll be hard to eat.

This dish is really pretty, and would be nice with a salad or Spanish rice if you're having guests. I should have taken a picture but we ate it too fast (again).